24/09/2024
A poem dedicated to all the Jones’s out there
The Joneses
It is part of our great culture
To adapt in times of change
Especially when our surnames
Do not seem so strange
We keep up with the Joneses
Pioneers of all trends
But though they’re great in number
We have ways to make amends
We call them by another name
And attach to them a tag
This makes it so much easier
For the ones we want to nag
The surname can be similar
Or duplicate you find
So use the tag to mention them
Is the one you’ll have in mind
There’s Jones the fish and Jones the Coal
And Jones the bread and butter
Jones the milk and Jones the Fruit
Jones gossip has a stutter
Jones the builder Jones the painter
Jones the planner is the man
Jones the Coop and Jones the Shop
And Jones the cobbler loves his Nan
Jones the preacher Jones the teacher
Jones the barber shaves your head
Jones the doctor Jones the Chemist
Jones undertakes our dead
Jones the midwife Jones the nurse
Jones the Banjo sings a song
Jones the welder Jones the spark
Jones the choir sings along
Jones the taxi Jones the flowers
Jones the rubbish clears up dirt
Jones the Miller Jones the Tiller
Jones the laundry irons a shirt
Jones the carpets Jones the tanner
Jones the accountant does the books
Jones the stylist Jones the nails
Jones the chef is one who cooks
Jones the music Jones the gas
Jones the shoe shop helps you walk
Jones the joiner Jones the tiles
Jones the cafe the place to talk
Jones the law Jones the wood
Jones the roofer keeps you dry
Jones the sprayer Jones the wool
Jones the chips will sell a pie
Jones the weather Jones the sweets
Jones the gardener cleans the weeds
Jones the cakes Jones the sweep
Jones the library one who reads
Jones the farmer Jones the roads
Jones the bus runs trips away
Jones the windows Jones the cars
Jones the dentist see today!
Jones the Agent Jones the artiste
Jones the plumber fixes leaks
Jones the bike Jones the sheep
Jones the nervous one who freaks
Jones the builder Jones the Bank
Jones you’ll never be alone
If you need to speak to Jones
They’re on the telephone
Gareth Thomas 2/01/2021