01/05/2020
Throw back to The Eclipse Summer of '97
KD3 - Crystal Ball.
Killer Diller has looked in the editorial crystal ball to see what 1997 holds. Here are our shocking and unexpurgated findings :
January
The Government announces an entertainment tax on all tickets sold at dance venues.
February
Club attendances plummet to
unprecedented depths.
March
The worst icy spell since the dinosaurs were wiped out prevents even the most fanatical Lindy Hoppers from travelling to
their favourite clubs.
April
The 100 Club, Jitterbugs, Hellzapoppin’ many others are forced to close because they can’t afford to pay their bar staff.
May
An anonymous dancer donates a million pounds to the newly defunct clubs with one proviso: that they join forces and share profits.
June
Hundreds cheer as a magnificent new venue, The Jitterpoppin’ Jivin’ Stompin' Warehouse (JJSW) opens in a long forgotten, perfectly preserved ballroom with a sprung floor, where the dancers have a right to boo off any DJ who they think is boring. Bands are forbidden to play any numbers which are longer than three and a half minutes.
July
Live Too Jive win the Queens award for Industry.
August
Tap dancing becomes a part of the National Curriculum and is made compulsory in British Schools. Underground cabaret clubs spring up where tap acts are positively prohibited.
September
The Swedish government bans the Herränq Dance Camp as the flow of traffic to Sweden in the summer months is responsible for several near misses in very crowded air-space over Stockholm and the worst congestion in the history of the airport.
October
The Lord Mayor of Acton awards the Jiving Lindy Hoppers the freedom of the swimming baths for services rendered to local shops and hotels.
November
The organisers of the new Dance Sans Frontiers Club* can’t agree on a date for their Christmas party.
December
The government repeals its entertainment tax and second Zoot Suit Wars breaks out as dance club organisers scramble to reopen their old venues. Dancers, fearing a return to the old rivalries mutiny. The club owners are trussed and deported in tumbrels to the continent to be sentenced to a lifetime of judging authentic La France Jive competitions and their trusty bar staff take over the running of the clubs with great success.
*aka JJSW see June