21/08/2025
Love insight for ;20th August,2025:I was told once that if you want to keep a man in a relationship for as long as you want him, you should keep letting him have your body.
Now, before you judge me, please hear me out.
I used to be that naive girl who believed relationships and men were nothing but heartbreak waiting to happen.
I kept my distance, telling myself that love was a trap. But as I grew older, I realized something I didn’t want to admit... as a woman, no matter how hard I tried to run from it, I was naturally drawn to the opposite gender.
I would sit with my friends and listen as they shared stories; how they spent their weekends at their boyfriends’ houses, the gifts they got on special occasions, and how much money was sent into their accounts.
At first, I didn’t believe them. I was raised to think that nothing comes free... that a man wouldn’t just give without taking something in return.
So, I asked them questions. And they told me plainly: if you want to keep a man, you must give him access to your body. That’s the price.
“I can’t, oh!” I snapped.
From that day, I became “the naive one.”
They left me out of conversations, and sometimes they would laugh and say I looked old and worn out. “Once a man touches you,” they would say, “you’ll start looking younger.”
Over time, their voices sank into my head. Bad ideas have a way of reshaping your mind if you hear them enough. I changed. And I decided to give it a try.
The first man who asked me out was a youth corps member. He wasn’t rich, but he was comfortable.
On our first day together, he bought me things I had never owned before. It felt like magic... the first time in my life that a man had treated me like I was special.
I had no brothers to spoil me. So to the men reading this: if you have an unmarried sister, buy her things. Tell her, “There’s nothing a man can give you that I can’t. Focus on yourself first.” You might save her from a mistake like mine.
Little did I know, I would have to pay for everything he bought me.
One afternoon, he asked me to come to his house. I went, still cautious. But one thing led to another, and somehow, I lost the will to say no. Even when my mouth tried to say no, it sounded like yes.
And then I remembered what my friends had said, “the best way to keep a man is to give him access to your body.” So I let him.
It’s true what they say; beauty fades in the wrong eyes. The moment it was over, he looked at me with disgust.
“Take your ugly self away,” he said.
Those words crushed me. For a woman giving love a chance for the first time, his reaction was a knife through my heart.
I thought men would want to stay once you give them what they wanted. Why was my story different?
I walked home feeling like a part of me had left. That night, I cried until my eyes were swollen shut. And even then, a part of me still wanted to hear his voice again. But he had already blocked me.
I learned the hard way that giving a man access to your body is like giving him a drink of water when he’s thirsty, once he’s satisfied, he’ll have no more use for the water until he’s thirsty again. And maybe... he may choose to quench his thirst with juice, not with water.
But that single moment of weakness came with a permanent consequence. I became pregnant.
And when the storm hit, none of my friends who had encouraged me to do it were there for me. Not one.
And that… is how I became a single mother
Currently, many guys are asking me out... some are even ready to marry me and accept my son. But I don’t have feelings for any of them. It’s like my heart can no longer love again.
To be honest, I went through a lot in my last relationship. I even started to despise men. Even those who are ready to take care of me, I turn them down. Sometimes, when they call me, I feel irritated, and after the call, I end up crying.
Please, I don’t really know what is wrong with me.
Is this normal?
Did I make any mistake by giving my body to him?
Did I make any mistake by listening to my friends?
Should I go drop the child and face my life and keep it as a secret?
I can't cater for this child...not ready for this
Credit to Iwuji Amarachi
